Ayumi Hamasaki's TeamAyu Diary Sept. 21-23, 2009

Hey everyone! Sorry for the short hiatus I had there. I would say "it won't happen again" but honestly, who knows what the future has in store for me? I'll TRY not to let it happen again, I will say that.

Anyway, Ayu gets a bit personal, shares some lyrics, and shows us the further adventures of her & her crew in Vegas - this time facing any fear of heights they might have at the top of Stratosphere Tower.


21 September 2009 8:53 AM

I thought of these words, and they've been doing this "zugyun-zugyun"* thing all morning, so I thought I'd try and post them here.

There was a beautiful scenery
From what angle is the scenery most beautiful?
Searching for its projection in my eyes
But I couldn't get it quite right
I can't see it from anywhere
And who am I looking at it with?

*I dunno what this means, from context i guess she means the words were crawling around in her head, but I can't be sure.

Super Express Service
22 September 2009 1:47 AM

...is delivered!!!!!!!

So, this. From Satsuki <3

This is how the front looks. <3

Had to hurry and change my summer-style cell phone into an end-of-year style one. <3
For a few days, things of a particularly personal nature were rather chaotic for me, so Satsuki-chan had lovely timing again, and gave me sparkling hope.
And she put a message card in with it. Let's zoom in, shall we...?

The characters saying "AIM FOR FUKUOKA ^_^ GO GO!!"...
So true.
At the end of Silver Week, I'll officially be able to talk about something, but until then, I still don't know everything so I can't say much, but...
Satsuki-chan and everyone on her staff took on a great deal of work for us, even sacrificing sleep. <3
So look forward to it!!!!!!!

Hey, it's okay to forget
I was just dreaming a little bit
Miracles don't exist, I know,
I know...

How long,
22 September 2009 6:43 AM

...have I walked with a purpose, having prepared myself for what comes after achieving freedom, even if the reaction is terrible? No matter how large the burdens are that I shoulder, I am never by myself, for better or for worse.

I've continued my journey like that for the last 11 years.

So this young girl, no longer scared of things she's ignorant of, realized that soon, she'd be 31 years old.

But, even though that's natural, and I'm not a god, I'm not flawless, in the end I'm still human, and the "Hamasaki Ayumi" who wants to keep protecting those she treasures is strongly standing on her own two feet, and I've sometimes thought I wanted to just be a girl in my private life.

Even so, I didn't understand why I should cry when I was sad. In pretending to be strong, it didn't matter how well things were going for me. I was still sad.

Everyone was kind enough to send messages saying "A miracle will definitely happen!!" as a contrast to the lyrics I put in one of my earlier entries.

Thank you.
For understanding me even when words fail me, thank you always.

Even if it's not a work problem, even if it's nothing to do with TA, when I have a really ultra-personal problem and I hit a wall, I'm honest with you.

There are definitely times when I can't easily escape total darkness. Those times, I know there's love. In such dark places, we're all the same. That's true, I think...

I'm probably gonna regret this when I wake up early and read it.
Eh, I'll skip the grumbling.
But I have all my TA comrades, so that's good, right?
You're okay with this sort of difficult me being the real me right now, right?
I'm sure when I wake up, I'll be smiling again. Because I'll be really enthusiastic writing the next part of my Vegas diary.

I met you, and I thought I knew the meaning of love
just a little...
But I know more than anyone that
a happy ending doesn't suit me.

Well that.... was a bit negative sounding. lol

Gotta sleep! Gotta sleep!!!!!!!!!!

*The last lines in "HAPPY ENDING."

22 September 2009 9:50 PM

The saddest thing is, I was the one who said "there are things I should give up on."
For noticing, and for teaching me various things, thank you all.
An amazing number of messages just keeps on coming.
And, the really moving thing is, everyone in "TA" is saying the same things.
It's amazing!
Tens of thousands of people giving out the same feelings when they send their messages.
It's like this gigantic circle of friends.
I just can't keep a level head anymore----!!!
I sound like an old person saying it but I'll never abandon you guys!

Ah, it's sudden, but hang on a sec.
Like... the feeling I'm projecting when I act like this.
That's it! I got alot of requests from everyone saying "Wait~!" The aforementioned Las Vegas diary continuation!

For those of you who forgot how the last installment ended, you should review it once, so please read it~.

I kept going along my merry way, and my journey has brought me here, ta-da!!!!!!

The top of Stratosphere Tower.
I didn't know how significant it would be, being so high up, swaying and shaking.
We got on this machine here real fast, ta-da!!

You probably still don't know the significance yet, so here's another scene to match that.
Not a good combination. Srsly.
You understand more if you see the photo, so here ya go!!

Not a good combination. S e r i o u s l y.
This thing pushed completely out away from the Tower.
But I didn't get on it. lol
I'm a person who seeks "beauty" in such situations, so I just watched.
So you guys understand now, I think.

He still manages to give a beautiful pose even from there. lol
Suu-san gives an unexpected peace sign.
"Subalog. Someday this might be a published book."
He said that. (He seemed relatively serious too.

Yes yes, let's hurry along!!!
Next up, the vehicle here, ta-da!!

So, do you get the significance now? lol
If you still don't get it very much, here's team member Minazo posing for some reason, next to Gori who isn't moving at all.

Naturally, here too, Mr. One-at-a-time.
His energy is as high up as the tower, naturally! lol

Cool! I somehow placed the camera well for this, huh? lol
By the way, Chon-san didn't get on this ride either.
But it wasn't because I was afraid, it was because I wanted to save face actually, so I declined. lol
Would be awfully scary to fall from such a high place, huh? ↓

Worn out. lol
Laughing so hard I'm crying. ↓
But check out Kanako's happy face behind me. She approves.

Finally, me turning into Kakkun-san on my knees. ↓
But check out Zin-san's delighted face behind me. He approves.

I couldn't stand yet, but I sure couldn't help laughing.↓

Everyone who's looking for even more stimulation is moving on to the next ride, but Chon-san is, of course, holding the fort.
Stan is yelling "No~~~!!!!!!!", while standing next to a person with no spirit at all.

But after that, I saw drinks being sold that were shaped like Stratosphere Tower, and my energy went right up!!!!!!
I'm so simple.

It was a part of the sightseeing! I couldn't NOT buy one, of course!
So I was just so happy-happy. lol
Like this, see?

I look way too happy. Stupidly happy. Whatever!

Although bouncy-happy after Stratosphere, everyone had to have clothes-changing time to go see some shows.

After the change of clothes, Kayanocchi is so prettyyyy~!
Hm? There's one person who looks funny. Ignoring everyone? lol

Mr. One-at-a-time, eventually decided to take off the sunglasses since it was nighttime and all. Yep.
When the show ended, we headed to our usual spot at our usual place for dinner.
That fountain, so awesome.☆

But during Chon-san's fountain time, there was always these two:

Basically, the fountain was always past Gori.
And also, the fountain was always past Sou.
Or, the fountain was always past these two, I should say.
At any rate, they sorta have this rough look about them, don't they? lol
Anyway, that brings us to the end of part 4~.
Now, I'm turning towards tomorrow's tour rehearsal, lots of staff are frantically working.
Yeah, tomorrow's not studio rehearsals, it's actual stage rehearsals that we're doing.
That's why everyone's working.
Such extravagance. We can't put it to waste, so everyone's preparing to turn towards Fukuoka with all their power!!!

23 September 2009 8:53 AM

I'm waking up very early~.
But I haven't switched to sleeping on this time zone yet so when evening comes, it only takes a moment and I start to crash.
Becoming a short sleeper like that seems unhealthy, so if anyone has any advice, please tell me~.
By the way, I heard Gori say, "If someone takes a third deep breath, the 2nd deep breath suddenly finishes." Maybe that's just Gori, but who knows? lol